What we can do

It’s been an interesting week.  Sitting with the always present struggle to incorporate things that feed my soul and my service to the world rather than my time filled with responsibilities that have to take priority.  It feels like I am always choosing one or the other.  A constant awareness that I am falling short.

This morning, I’m sitting with the very palpable inclination to let that feeling of constant failure die to simply giving thanks for the life that I’m gifted to live in this moment.  To learn how to give myself to the blessing of whatever presents in the moment, and to know that whatever it is, responsibility or otherwise, that Spirit is offering me to BE and to Bless in the very best way that I can in that moment.  And to know that as long as I show up in the best way that I can, that THAT is the best investment I can make:  for myself and for the world.

I decided to let this percolate for a while in the meanderings of my mind.

As I was feeling into that this afternoon, one of my kiddos sends me yet another sad news feed.  This one is about suicide in Korea, and how devastating life can feel; that the world is suffering and no one “in power” wants to address the actual issues.  My child’s precious heart, like many, are overwhelmed with it all and heavily sitting on the side of depression/all-is-lost.

I sat with this, and had to accept that I have no clue how to help so many who are suffering in this way globally. All of our struggles seem so very big and so very complex.  And when we look at it from that perspective, it certainly feels so very heavy and unfixable.

…and yet, as I pray about this, and ask how I might align with a way that could possibly make any difference at all, I become aware that I can choose to be as present as possible with each person or situation I meet.  To allow compassion and presence as best I can.  And to follow my inner guidance about any situation.  That way, if I can be of service globally, so be it.  If I can be of service individually, so be it.  And I have a knowing somewhere inside that whispers to the Truth of just how powerful that presence, compassion, and inner guidance is. The beat of a butterfly’s wing can create a hurricane.

I can’t push anymore.  I can’t hold this immense weight on my individual shoulders anymore of trying to save the world. No one can, yet so often we can feel that our part nowadays must be on such a spectacular level.

What I CAN do, is to soften into a better space that will teach me deeper truths, and more expansive connections that create real healing and communion beyond my current narrow scope of understanding. And I know that as I listen deeply, those moments of inspired action will arise within me and as I put them into play, it will make the best difference it can make in that moment… and the heart-centered undercurrents of what transpired will invite more like it to ripple out…to touch and influence more, even if I never get to witness it personally.

I’m still not sure how to balance Spirit with a conventional life filled with responsibilities. But I have a feeling that this desire to recycle my 50 years of habitual pushing may lead to new insights and opportunity;  and what is beginning to grow from that recycling hints at learning to be present with a genuine heart, of deep listening, of Spirit living through us in each moment.  The daily spiritual practices we can incorporate are beautiful tools that can help us to do this.  And as much as I long to engage them regularly, my life is also full with earthly living; so I am learning to incorporate them into being present in each moment instead, deepening my ability to engage whatever presents.

In my rambling here, I am thinking of you and me and all of us who are in this amazing and intense time, and how collective and personal it all feels.

I pray that as we navigate it, we come to deeper understanding and a true sense of the Love and Grace that support us. 

I guess it wouldn’t be as exciting (?!) if we didn’t have a little drama along the way, hmmmm?!

I pray that we find clear guidance, strong and loving support, and blessed communion with our most sacred and holy self as well as with the beautiful and messy part of us that lives here on this Beloved Earth at this incredible time.  And at least a few moments to laugh about it all as we don our costumes and take our roles in this ultimate of theatrical plays!

Thank you for your life.  For the beauty and the blessing that can only come in through you.  Thank you to each and all.  What a ride.  What a ride!

Munay

Kimberly Logan

Harmonic Luminosity

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